For Your Enjoyment...

Well since I have been away for so long I thought I would provide you some entertainment at my expense.

I was shopping at Fred Meyer today and being the good little crunchy tree hugger I am, brought my own bags to use. Now occasionally I will use these bags for other things. I think I most recently used them to go swimming at the girls' swimming lessons. I usually look for one of my favorite checkers, but none of my usuals were there so I went in this young man's line. He was maybe 20 years old. Do you see where any of this is going yet?

He bags up a few of my reusable bags and he then opens my Trader Joe's canvas bag (my favorite) and what does he reach in and pull out? A pair of my underwear!!! They were clean thank goodness and still folded up, but the young kid was still holding up my very not so cute and pretty panties. He looked at me and I said "Oh My! Here I'll take those." He then proceeds to throw them at me like they were on fire. I tucked them in my purse and he just kept laughing.

Why were my underwear in the bag you ask? Trust me I was asking myself that for about an hour until I finally figured it out. I was planning on swimming at the girls' swimming lessons the last class so I wore my bathing suit under me clothes and brought a bra and undies to change into. When I got there and saw all of the skinny bitches in their bathing suit and my fellow chubbette mom not in hers, I chickened out. Well I put on my bra, but just kept my bathing suit bottoms on (hell yeah I'm rocking the bikini!- okay, don't think string bikini, think more very long topped tankini) thus leaving the underwear unused. I must have emptied out the bag and forgot about them in there until today.

I'm thinking this may replace me farting really loudly in church (with the love of my life at the time Aaron Lossness sitting directly behind me) while my six grade class was rehearsing our readings for the next day's mass as my most embarrassing moment. Well at least I accomplished something today, right?